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Title: What’s With All the Kissing?
Series: Part 4 of the Kissing Arc; after Kissing Fools
Author: Makoto Sagara
Archive: The usual suspects; anywhere else, ask me first.
Category: Shounen Ai, Humour
Pairings: 2+5+2, 3+5, 3+2, 1+2
Rating: T (13+)
Warnings: Shounen Ai, weird humour, OOC

Disclaimers: Have no money. Make no money. Suing is bad for health. Just b/c my high angst muse made me.
Author’s Notes: After going through everything I wrote, I decided to pick back up on the crack!fics I’d started. Enjoy!
What’s With All the Kissing?
To say that Heero was confused would have been an understatement. Just when he was getting used to the idea of Duo and Chang sneaking off in their downtime to make out, Trowa began joining them. It was strange. He had thought that Trowa was at least sane. But, this, this made no sense.
The Wing pilot had no point of reference for this type of behaviour. A part of him understood that the fact that they were all different from each other, not to mention *normal* teenage boys, this was going beyond the limits of logic.
Duo… He could see him kissing Chang. He could see him kissing Barton. Both of them were attractive, in an odd, detached sort of way. But for Barton and Chang to kiss one another? Why? Duo was sensual. Everything about him reeked of sex and an unnatural earthiness that defied logic. He got them wanting to kiss Duo and possibly do more. But each other? It didn’t compute.
Unsure of where to go with this new information, the confused boy began searching the public net. He was astonished with the amount of material that showed up, most of it down right pornography, which made his stomach turn in funny ways. Searching carefully, Heero found a medical website that dealt with sexual items in a very clinical way. That was enough for him. He began to devour every article on the site, finding the subject oddly informative.
“Whatcha reading, Heero?” Duo asked in a voice that was oddly carefree.
Heero’s head snapped up, feeling the blood rush to his ears and cheeks guiltily. “Nothing,” he replied, closing the lid to his laptop with more force than needed.
“Hm,” Duo said, sidling up next to the chair Heero still sat in. “Somehow, I don’t quite believe you. It had to be something interesting for you to react like that.”
“It’s nothing, Duo,” Heero said, jumping up from his seat guiltily. The American pilot chuckled darkly.
“Sure, but you know you can tell me.” He came so close that Heero could smell the strawberry shampoo he’d used that morning. “Anything.” He was purring!
“Wu-Wufei…” Heero stammered.
“What about Wufei?”
“What’s it like… to…”
“To what, Heero?” Duo came even closer, allowing Heero to smell the minty toothpaste the other boy used.
“To… kiss…”
His heart-shaped face broke out into a predatory smile. “Would you like to find out?” Heero could feel his eyes grow larger in discomfort as his compatriot came closer. When the other boy was all but touching him, Duo began laughing so hard, he doubled over. “You’re too cute, ‘Ro! You thought I really was going to kiss you!”
Confusion and then anger flashed across Heero’s face before he nodded to himself. He pulled Duo up by his arms and clumsily kissed the cackling American, effectively shutting him up. He inwardly smiled when he felt Duo’s muscles tense up and then relax as he grew accustomed to the kiss. Heero moved one hand from Duo’s arm and used it to pull his head in closer. When his victim began to moan, Heero released him.
“Understood,” he said and turned to walk away.
“Wait! Heero!” Duo’s deep voice was breathless and tantalizing, but the Wing pilot had gathered all the information he needed. Kissing Duo was definitely worth it. But he still wasn’t sure about Trowa… He’d have to gather more information.